Your Kids Need Their Own Faith
Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old, he will not depart from it.
Proverbs 22:6, ESV
So faith comes from hearing, and hearing through the word of Christ.
Romans 10:17, ESV
Have you ever thought how important it is for your child to develop their own faith?
One of the greatest failures that many parents go through is allowing their children to go out into the world with the faith of Mom and Dad instead of their own. Now, I don't want this to be misunderstood, because I do believe that we parents need to share a common faith with our kids, and the best way to ensure that our children will know the truth that is taught in God's Word is for we parents to teach them that truth. And the only way we can teach them the truth is to know what it is ourselves.
When we look at these two Biblical truths above, we come to these conclusions: First, we understand that it is a duty of all parents to train our children in the way they should go, and that necessarily means God's way. Further, Jesus revealed that He is the way and that no man can come to the Father except through Him. Second, the process of training a child in the way he should go will involve an understanding of the child's own aptitude and personality. While it is true that there is only one truth contained within the Scriptures, each child will have his or her own personal strengths and weaknesses, so we need to be aware of that when we are training them.
It's akin to a baseball team. There are 9 different positions, from the infielders to the outfielders, and from the pitcher to the catcher. All have different strengths and different roles to play, but all are playing the same game by the same set of rules. In a like fashion, your kids will have their own special set of skills, but all must live by the same set of Biblical rules. So, we teach them these Biblical truths, but we also recognize our children's unique strengths and weaknesses, and we train them accordingly. A vital part of that training will involve their coming into contact with God's Word, so we start them out as infants by simply talking to them about God and perhaps reading sound Bible story books to them. We enhance this training by taking them to Bible classes at the church, as well as making sure that we are worshipping together with the church.
And while I believe that no child should be given the choice of attending the Bible classes and worship that the parents have determined are necessary, I also believe that this needs to be carefully approached so that the children will see this as something that is pleasant as well as needed for them to be obedient to their Father in Heaven.
Here, though, is where so many of us make our big mistake: While it is true that we parents have the duty to ensure our children are worshipping with the church and reading the word of God, there must be something in that part of the training that makes our children want to do these things, and especially as they mature into their teen years. You will never have a problem motivating your kids to play the sports they want to play, but unless they have a passion for that sport, they might not want to go to all of the practices or put in the hard work necessary for them to excel at the sport. In this case, the ones who are the best at sports are the ones who not only have a talent for that sport, but also a passion and love for it that will motivate them to the practice and hard work needed to do their best.
Here comes the point, and the tricky part: In order for our children to develop their own faith, they are not only going to have to hear the words of God and Christ, but they are going to have to want to hear those words! In short, they are not only going to have to understand the basic truths about God, but somewhere along the line they are going to have to develop a passion for God's Word and a love for Christ. I'm not saying that this will be easy - it is not - but I am saying that this is a fundamental part of every parent's duty. And the reason for our understanding that duty is this: If you force your religion on your kids where it becomes an unpleasant thing, if you drag them kicking and screaming to the worship each week, if you give them a view of God that He is somehow unloving and cruel and that He is just waiting for them to step out of line so that He can crush them, then when that day comes when they leave your house to start lives of their own, do not be surprised when they not only leave your home, but leave God as well.
And the reason for this is simple: We have trained our children up not so much to love God and Christ, but to fear them! And while the fear of God is vital, if we only teach them the "terror part" and leave out the respect and duty and especially the love parts of service, then they will likely just leave a religion that they have come to know as cruel and unloving.
So, what is the solution? It begins with our own hearts - we must first love God and Christ and desire above all else to serve them as best we can. We will do that when we realize the depth of Their love for us! Remember, God loved you so much that He gave you life in the first place, and then He gave you His only begotten Son to die for your sins. And Jesus? Well, Jesus loved us so much that He was willing to die for our sins! Once we have fully understood and embraced these truths, it will be then that we can introduce our children to God and Christ - and we will do so with a passion! That passion for service that stems from a wholehearted love for God is infectious, and will certainly spread to their own lives if we train them in the right way.
Though it will take time, these little ones will grow up with a love and respect for God that will motivate them to find out what they need to be doing to please Him. And while it is true that you will have already been teaching your kids about these very things, their love for God and Christ will further motivate them to want to serve them. That means that doing things like reading the Bible on their own and getting ready to go to Bible classes and worship, will no longer be things that they view as "have to do" but "get to do"! And by coming to this stage of maturity, they will be developing their own faith.
Then, they will be ready to go off into the real world, because they will have their own faith!
It is a hard thing to raise our children in such a way, but when you really think about it, everything truly worthwhile is hard! The reward, however, is worth it!
Do your kids have their own faith? It is a question we all must do our best to ensure that we can answer in the affirmative. Not only is it our duty, but it is also our privilege! And make no mistake, nothing less than our children's eternal souls are at stake, so we must do our best to answer this question in the right way.